Review: Iron Man #64

Rick Moore
2 days ago
7 min read

Stuck Between a Rokk and a Rotten Comic!

“Mommy! Rick said a bad word! I saw him reading a comic book and then saying the “s” word!”

Having heard my younger sister calling out from the bottom of the stairs, I know what’s next. “Is that true?”

Since I’m in my upstairs bedroom, I don’t have to look my determined mother in the eye for what I’m about to say next. “Of course not. What I actually said about this new issue of Iron Man is that it’s an absolute hit.” Knowing that a multitude of “Hail Mary's” were in my future, I continued, “I’m sorry my sister misunderstood me. I’ll be more careful with what I say.”

“That’s good to hear,” my mother responds, adding words that nearly cause me to curl into fetal position, “Otherwise, there would be no more superhero comic books for you and your collection would go into the fireplace!”

Good thing that Happy's Tony's best friend. Hate to see what he'd look like if it was really pissed off.

A near disaster of epic proportions narrowly averted!

All because Iron Man #64 was not only a lousy follow-up to the previous issue, but a pretty damned lame comic book all on its own.

What stands out most about this comic is that it’s disappointing on virtually every level. You name it and it drops every ball tossed into the air from the previous issue.

What do I mean by that?

Join me and find out as we find out that “Rokk Cometh!”

Credits

Writer: Mike Friedrich

Pencils: George Tuska

Inks: Mike Esposito

Colorist: George Roussos

Letterer: Artie Simek

Cover Art: John Romita & Mike Esposito

Editor: Roy Thomas

Release Date: July 31, 1973

Synopsis

The downbound train starts with a dreadful and way-too-wordy cover, where some burly, gray-skinned brute who isn’t the Hulk has already peeled off Iron Man’s armor with Pepper and Happy heading for the exits. Gotta say, I expect much better from John Romita.

At least George Tuska and Mike Esposito seek to make amends with a more dynamic splash page which is marred like a scribbled moustache on a nice portrait with Mike Friedrich’s “Color Him Angry!” caption.

From there, it’s not one, but four pages of Iron Man tearing down an old building as well as constructing a new one - all by his lonesome! (Just how long was that crowd waiting?) This gives him a nice opportunity to bring us all up to speed on last issue - including the outcome of The Kiss! Which is much ado about nothing with Happy stomping away. BTW, Tony how do you think Pepper felt when you kept saying this scene wasn’t what it looked like?

But before accolades can be delivered for Iron Man’s work on the new building, Dr. Spectrum returns to destroy it. However, his sentient prism’s rebellion reduces the rematch to about six badly-drawn panels before our hero’s famed (at least for this story!) “ultra-violet ray” has the multi-colored challenger escape in a cloud of purple smoke.

If Tony thinks the day will get any easier, an irate Happy Hogan awaits him back at HQ. He even gets in a couple good punches before the Wrath of Pepper arrives, deservedly chastising both men. She also returns the favor with Tony’s “It’s not what it looks like” remark by referring to the previous night as an “insane fling.” Nope. Pepper and Tony are not going to talk about what happened.

Before any of us can digest all that drama, both Dr. Obatu and Eddie March interrupt with the former informing Tony that he wishes to hire Iron Man. As for who he needs protection from, the answer arrives with a bald giant with powder blue skin, hairy chest and wooden club. Calling himself Rokk - although I don’t know if he specified that his name has two “k’s” instead of the normal spelling. Attacking Tony Stark, he tells him he plans to attack his loved ones. That leads Tony to think of the Annoying Hippy. And that in turn leads to Rokk using a beam from a pimple on his forehead to read Tony’s mind.

With that nugget of knowledge secure, Rokk grabs Obatu and flies towards Roxie Gilbert - wherever that is. As Tony changes into his armored alter ego, he pats himself nicely on the back for thinking of Roxie instead of Pepper - who he actually first thought about. That’s all he needs to have a clear conscience. Sure. Anything you say, Tony.

Since we don’t have enough drama, Pepper refers to the departing Iron Man as “Tony’s metal monster.” Still notably peeved, Happy recalls that he knows that Iron Man is the guy his wife was smooching the previous night. Yeah, something may come of that.

Listen to the blonde in the red dress and never take a date to a health food store!

Heaping yet another barrel of drama on this issue, we have the Annoying Hippy working in her health food store - because what else would a pacifist do for a living? - and embarrassed over her thoughts of Tony Stark. To which I’m wondering just what happened on that first date?

Anyway, Rokk appears as tired of all this nonsense as I am with him smashing everything gluten-free item in sight, driving out the customers and taking his club to everything else.

Once Iron Man arrives, he spends the next three pages tackling the Powder-Blue Hulk. It’s not a particularly impressive battle hero as he falls back to physically engaging what’s clearly a physically tough opponent. Small wonder that he soon remarks that his armor’s now low on power. Even worse, the sensors in his armor indicate that Rokk’s essentially energy and someone’s creation. If only Iron Man could determine who that is?

Now who could Iron Man know who creates things consisting of pure energy?

Fortunately, since we’ve only one page left, Dr. Spectrum takes on the role of Captain Obvious in revealing that he’s the one who created Rokk to weaken Iron Man so that the scimitar he’s now formed can serve as this issue’s cliffhanger!

Oh, and we’re told that next issue, we learn the Origin of Dr. Spectrum! Yay. I can hardly wait.

Story

The Steele Syndrome strikes! That’s when the second banana stands out over the top villain- as the flunky Steele did a couple issues back over the inept Masked Marauder. Here, it was Rokk - an energy creation - outdoing the actual heavy against Iron Man. But apparently, that was part of the plan? If the prism is capable of creating creatures of Rokk’s power, why stop with one? Two and Iron Man’s likely out of the game. For that matter, are we supposed to believe that our hero didn’t figure out that Rokk had been created by Dr. Spectrum? Along those lines, what’s up with that weird Dr. Obatu? What about “Color Him Angry!” And don’t get me started on The Kiss.

Had this ride been any rougher I’d have gotten car sick. 3/10

Art

Don’t go thinking that either of you are getting off any easier. Although Rokk as a third-rate bruiser with the bald head and hairy body is somewhat visually intriguing, overall, this issue comes across as pretty dull. There are several poorly drawn panels with the fight between Dr. Spectrum and Iron Man in the early pages. And while the much longer battle between Rock and our hero comes across better, it’s still consists of standard poses that we’ve seen many, many times before.

Overall, not one of either of your better efforts. 5/10

Wimp Factor

Have to ask, was Rokk really that powerful? If so, then having him give Iron Man so much grief isn’t all that embarrassing. That and there were certainly a number of innocent bystanders to also consider. That may have prevented him from using other weapons. But once he learned that the creature was energy, why didn’t our hero change his tactics? Have to add that I did not like the “running out of power” nonsense rearing it’s head again either. Could’ve been worse. But definitely could’ve been better. 6/10

Not one of Tuska or Esposito's better panels.

Villain Rating

Last issue, Tony remarked that Dr. Spectrum could topple the Mandarin to become his number one opponent. However, after this issue, I don’t think the Asian menace has anything to worry about. Between an unimpressive showing early and the bickering with his prism, the bloom is quickly falling off his rose. 5/10. As for Rokk, at least he had Iron Man breaking a good sweat. 5/10

Overall Rating

Have to say that it was a pretty rough outing on this one. 4/10

Additional Nuts & Bolts

I feel bad being rather harsh on Mike Friedrich as he was one of my favorite writers as a kid when I started reading comics. Since I mentioned in my previous review that Dr. Spectrum was created as a knock-off to Green Lantern as part of an unofficial JLA-Avengers crossover and since Mike Friedrich was the one who wrote Justice League of America #87 with DC’s version of said crossover, let me share his “Champions of Angor,” consisting of Wandjina (Thor), Silver Sorceress (Scarlet Witch), and Blue Jay (Yellowjacket). Not quite to the level of The Squadron Sinister or Squadron Supreme, but certainly fun!

I know that I make too much of The Kiss. It was a silly comic book drama more than anything else. But what never made any sense to me was that neither Tony nor Pepper ever talked about what happened in any subsequent issue. How could they work together or interact on a social level without addressing the emotions and passions that were so apparent that night? (And my adult mind wonders just what Happy would have walked in on had he arrived a little later?) Oh well, at least the MCU had no problems with Tony and Pepper actually having a relationship.